Thankful

In two days we will all celebrate Thanksgiving. I will also be celebrating my 40th birthday. On the outside, I'm cool and calm. I say things like I'm going to be forty and fabulous, and I will. However, on the inside, I'm beating myself up over the time I wasted in my 20's and some of my 30s doing nonproductive things like clubbing and dating knuckleheads who weren't worthy of me, my time, or my fabulous existence.

So, I'm freaking out a little, but deep inside, I am truly grateful for the blessings in my life. My father may no longer be with me and I lost the love of my life, but I am left with a wonderful mother, great siblings, awesome friends, and amazing nieces and nephews who help keep me sane. They all bring joy to my life, and have been there for me through thick and thin. They are a constant reminder of how blessed I am.

So in the spirit of Thanksgiving, I am sharing with you my gratitude list for 2011. Here are the things I am most thankful for:

1. Family


2. Friends


3. A stable job and freelance clients


4. Food to eat


5. Warm shelter


6. Cable television (without my favorite TV show Psych, life just wouldn’t be the same)


7. Sight, hearing and a sane mind (some days the sane mind is arguable)
   and last but never least,


8. a merciful God who continues to provide for me through the good, the bad and even the ugly (those non-angelic days I sometimes have.)

So on Thursday when you're enjoying your turkey and stuffing, and all the other stuff we stuff in our faces on Thanksgiving, don't just think about the one or two things you have to be thankful for, think of five or more things you’ve been blessed with, because there are others out there who would steal and sometimes kill (read the news) to have what we so often take for granted in this country.

And try to be thankful every day, not just on Thanksgiving. Because God brings blessings year round – not just during the holidays.

Peace and blessings and a very happy Thanksgiving holiday to you.

Injury Won't Stop Me

Last week I injured my foot pretty bad. I had one friend who was a former paramedic tell me it was probably broken, reiterated by my brother-in-law who is an orthopedic assistant. So you can imagine my relief when I went to the doctor and was told it was only a really bad sprain. Still not great, especially since I have to wear a big orthopedic boot, but it beats having a broken foot and wearing a cast.

So since I haven't been able to work out at the gym (which I joined a little over a week ago), I've been feeling really lethargic, not motivated to do anything but go to church. I realized it must be because I’m not working out like I was before. Even before I joined the gym, I speed walked around my neighborhood at least three times a week. So I realized that if I was going to get motivated to do anything, I would have to find a way to exercise with the orthopedic boot on my foot.

I remembered that after my fibroid surgery, I could do little walking, going up and down the steps without pain, etc. I had begun doing simple leg lifts from my bed, similar to ones I did with weights when I worked out at Curves once. Amazingly, the simple exercises made me feel better and more energetic. So I’ve begun doing the same exercises while waiting for my foot to heal.

Of course these exercises don’t give me the lift that working out at the gym does, but they do give me some energy to get up and move. I was in decent shape when I joined the gym, but nothing like I wanted to be. And since I could be in this boot for up to a month, I am determined not to gain weight or lose the little bit of strength I gained when I exercised on a regular basis.

This injury has also taught me not to waste time. Before I hurt my foot, I wanted to take a Zumba class, but because of my need to be perfect at everything, I didn’t take the class out of fear I might not be as good as all the others in the class. This is crazy because I kicked butt in every dance class I took at VCU. I mean the fact I wasn’t afraid to take a Krav Maga class after surgery, but too scared to take a Zumba class perfectly healthy is CRAZY. If I were to have permanent damage to my foot and never had taken the class, I'd be really upset with myself.

So, hopefully, once my foot heals, I will stop being a scaredy cat and take the Zumba class. But one thing is for sure, I will keep moving no matter what. I wasted enough time in my 20s and 30s when I was stronger, and now that I don’t have youth on my side, I am determined to feel and be strong regardless of surgery, injury or anything else that comes along. Because I don’t want to just be strong now, I want to be strong at 40, 50,60 and even 70. I read an article in the The Washington Post Magazine about a 72 year old female weight lifter. I know it can be done.

After all the pain and loss I’ve dealt with in my life, I am just ready to be not only be strong, not just happy, I want to be fabulous. Like Paul said in Philippians 3:14, "I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me." What's the prize I'm striving for? Feeling victory instead of fear and regret. I've had enough of that. Now I'm ready to kick fear and regret's butt. And look and feel fabulous doing it.