Wednesday, November 5, 2008

The Day Obama Made History

On election night I began watching the results on TV right at 7 pm, when only 15% of the votes were in. By 9 pm, I got tired of waiting and browsed the Internet. An hour or so later, my mother came downstairs and told me that Obama had won Ohio, and that no Republican had ever won a race where he lost Ohio. She had a look on her face that read "this is it." I still wasn't convinced. Until I heard the words president-elect and Obama in the same sentence I wouldn't believe it.
At 11 pm, I went to sign out of my email when a message from essence.com appeared. It read "Yes We Did! Barack Obama Becomes the Next President." I didn't know what to think. I got excited then I got paranoid. "Is it possible they could know this soon? It's not even midnight." So I got up from the computer and went upstairs to check out the TV coverage. I didn’t' see Barack, but to my amazement, I saw McCain giving his concession speech. I was dumbfounded. How did this happen so fast, and why wasn't McCain contesting the results? I was almost sure he would becaus I assumed the results would be close. They weren't. The information bar on the bottom of the TV screen showed that Obama had received 334 electoral votes. No one could contest that. Newscasters only needed 270 to make a projection. Obama had also received 51% of the vote, and he had won the election. It was true. Barack Obama was going to be our next president.
I wanted to share the moment with my 70-year old father, who is African-American and for the first time in his life registered to vote this year. For him, this was more than history being made. This was a dream he thought would never come to pass in his lifetime. I went into his room and we restlessly waited for Obama to come on the screen to give his acceptance speech. I watched as Michelle kissed Obama and said " I love you" to him. It was a beautiful and touching moment, and I realized how this win also represented something else for black America. Black love and success can coexist.
I had always believed that the minute I found out that Obama had won, I'd be in tears. I wasn't. I was still in disbelief and shock. I wasn't able to get too emotional because it still wasn't real to me. But as I watched him give his speech and begin talking about the 106 year old woman in Atlanta, and all the events she had seen in her life, including how "a preacher from Atlanta (Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.) told a people that 'We shall overcome," the tears began to fall. And they still do, each time I think about this win and how because of it, Dr. King's dream is realized. His work along with the work of Fannie Lou Hamer, Malcom X, Medgar Evers and all the others whose lives represented the struggle for black equality, can now rest in peace. Their life's work and their deaths were not in vain.
The next morning, I saw the front page headline of The Washington Post that read "Obama Makes History," and the tears began again. It really happpened. At that moment I realized there really is going to be a black family in the White House. There will be a black family representing America. Black Americans everywhere who once had no hope now will have hope. We can now tell our black children that they can do anything, and they will believe us. They will see that you don't have to play dirty to be a success. Rather, they will see that with hard work, dignity and grace that you CAN achieve your dreams. We did it. We abandoned our fears, we kept hope alive, and we made this happen. And I can't stop crying.
It may sound like a cliché but I'll say it anyway. It's a beautiful day in America. It's a beautiful day in the world. Change is on its way, and I can't wait to be a part of it.

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Waiting for My Destiny

Last Friday as I sat at the bar of my neighborhood Mexican restaurant Los Tios, waiting to pick up the chicken quesadilla I ordered, I couldn't help but notice all the groups of people, mostly families and young couples with kids enjoying themselves. It made me feel as though I should be doing something more than eating takeout alone on a Friday night. Then I got to thinking, wait a minute! I'm a 36, not 26, and clubbing or doing something else wild on a Friday night isn't really what I need to be doing anyway. Unlike when I was 26, I am striving toward a specific goal, to get two of my children's books published by this coming October and to hopefully sell a ton of them during the holiday season. To accomplish this, I don't need to be partying; I need to, even on a Friday night, keep working toward that goal doing market research and anything else that will help me get to that goal. My life has been pretty good, but I want more out of it than what I've been given - a lot more. I've realized that I've got to stop expecting my life to be like that of those colleagues and friends who are social workers, teachers, nonprofit managers and such, because unlike them, once I am published, my daily life will be nothing like theirs. I would like what I consider a "normal" life but I have to face the fact that my career aspirations aren’t "normal" therefore my journey getting there won't be like everyone else's. I've been temping for a little over a year now, and I'm really tired of it. REALLY tired of it. But I have to work to pay the bills, and if I decide to self-publish my book I have to work to save enough money to do it. There is a chance that I may get a publisher, I think my stories are good enough to get a major publisher, but I’m not going to count on that. I’ve read too many stories of people getting 20 or more rejections before getting a publisher, and I’m not willing to wait that long when I can do it myself in a matter of months. I know that the success I seek is going to happen for me, everyone keeps telling me that my writing is great, but it just seems so far away. But if the old adage, "a good thing is worth waiting for" is true, I must be on my way to something REALLY good. I haven't lost faith, just patience, which has always been a challenge for me. But I guess if Toni Morrison waited until she was 39 before she won her Pulitzer, I can wait another year or two, or three, or even four, to become a best selling millionaire. But damn it if I'm not raking in the dough at age 39 in four years, I'm going to try out for the Rockettes, which was the dream I had at 16, and maybe I'll make history and become the first 40-year old Rockette. I did win a sexy legs contest once, it could happen! I mean, you gotta have a back up plan right? But just in case the Rockette thing doesn't work out either, I'll make sure I have a second backup plan that includes a real career like teaching or something, because I wouldn't want to end up in the loony bin, which is where I would probably end up, trying to be a Rockette at 40 years old. So for now, I'll try not to jump out of the 10 story building I'm temping in and just be thankful I've got work - no matter how mind numbing it may be. I promise that you won’t hear about me on the evening news, my patience isn’t up yet. I do however plan to be on the evening news one day, but in a very positive way - after I've sold a ton of books! It’s going to happen, I’m just in a bit of a rut right now, but some way, some how I’m going to make it happen . Just you wait! I know God wouldn't put the desire in me to do it if he didn't want it for me. Knowing that is what keeps me going, and what makes me know without a doubt this is what I am meant to do.